askclint:

Pro-tip for Writers: Never have your character take out his or her hearing aids out of self-consciousness for being too loud in the midst of fucking.

Take them out because it’s uncomfortable as hell to wear them in bed what the hell is wrong with you

true fucking facts

Depression glass (left) and uranium (Vaseline) glass (right and behind)

Under black light they glow.

Depression glass (left) and uranium (Vaseline) glass (right and behind) Under black light they glow.

My mom gave me a few pieces of grandmothers uranium glass collection (including a piece of depression glass) and while the aesthetic is not mine I fucking love this glowing glass.

Doug Glatt: Where is LaFlamme? 
Gord Ogilvey: Probably giving some single mother herpes out in the parking lot.

(Source: chuckles-hansen)

Goon 2011 Bucky strolling into practice late and high because fuck all he used to be one of the best and then some asshole took that opportunity to bash his brains in dig their skate into his shoulder and Steve watching Buck come in late he doesn't know this guy except he yelled at him in Russian when he accidentally walked in on him doing coke off some hookers back and really that's not a way to meet someone but look at him he fucking never takes his eyes off of him because this is the dude he was hired to protect because Bucky is SO terrified of being on the ice - of being hit- and Steve is there to give him the strength he needs to go back to playing like he did JUST STOP pucks and kisses

Anonymous asked:

Okay so all you guys--you and invisiblespork and boopboopbi and ink-Phoenix--are great. But you're being a bit off puttingly self righteous about the fact that people "don't see the abuse!" in Snake Eyes, like that makes anyone who doesn't see everything you guys see somehow complicit in like ... the concept of abuse. Not everyone has been abused, so not everyone is tuned in like that, and not having been abused does not make us lesser people. Does it? (Continues)

Answer:

invisiblespork:

thunderboltsortofapenny:

(Continued) It doesn’t mean we don’t want to see it. And isn’t boop TRYING to show how hard it can be to see this stuff? The fact that she’s succeeding at conveying the difficulty in seeing this stuff and the subtlety if the signs is not cause to look down on some readers … I hate to be such a critic but it’s starting to make me feel like a bad person.”
-
I’m making this explicitly clear, my answer to this is mine and mine alone.  If any of the others want to respond, they certainly can, but I did not discuss my answer to this ask with any of them and I expect any reaction to my answer to come to me, and only me.
-
If anyone is being self-righteous about it, it’s me. Because it was frankly incredibly disconcerting to hear after each update that no one had said a damn word about the signs, obvious or otherwise, about the abuse that Boop had put into the chapter. And I had pages of notes, while most of the reaction here and on ao3 was about Steve being mean, or Bucky being a dick, or Karpov being an okay guy. So, yeah, it was frustrating, and honestly, it was getting scary. Because we [and I’m using ‘we’ very loosely here] thought that the signs were getting missed. And since nothing in the fic is an exaggeration of what happens and yeah, since I personally and professionally have experience in abuse and it’s after-effects, I was pissed. Over the last week, I probably have been self-righteous at times. I’m not going to apologize for noticing the foreshadowing, or for being upset at the initial lack of response.
I’m not asking that everyone catch every single thing. I certainly haven’t.  I didn’t catch the eating disorder until after chapter 6.  As I’ve said before, the abuse is occurring on multiple levels, and some of it it obvious and some of it isn’t.  Emotional and verbal abuse is very subtle, and the after effects of physical and sexual abuse often get thrown into the “acting out” behaviors, or seen as the problem itself and not a symptom. Prime example, no one’s asked why Bucky uses.  It’s seen as a problem in and of itself, and not as a coping mechanism to deal with the abuse.
 I don’t think people that miss things because they don’t know what they’re seeing are bad people. Everyone has been Sam, and lots of people are still where Sam’s at. I’ve been Sam. I’m still Sam in a lot of areas, including areas that are in the fic. But here’s the thing about Sam: he’s starting to see it. He’s starting to see what’s actually happening. He’s starting to change his attitude, and his actions, based on that. People who don’t see it because it doesn’t occur to them that it could happen are not the people I’m yelling about.
I’m talking about the people who deliberately ignore the signs. I’m talking about the ones who have said “yeah I see it, I just don’t care.” I’m talking about the people who think Bucky deserves what’s happened, as if a victim is ever to blame for what their abuser did to them. This isn’t just toxic and victim-blaming, it’s dangerous as hell.  I mean, you want a real life example? Look at the media fallout from Kesha coming out about her abuse. Look at what people have said. Look at what Katy Perry said. This is what I’m yelling about. People who, when presented with the signs and facts, say “it’s not that big of a deal” and “they must have done something to provoke them.”  This is so harmful. Almost as harmful as the abuse itself. This is what destroys people.  To be that brave, and talk about what happened, to finally be in a place they feel safe enough to start to rebuild? And then get it thrown in their face like that? That’s what I’m yelling about. That’s what get’s me mad.
….and not having been abused does not make us lesser people. Does it?”
I’m gonna give you some advice right now: don’t ever fucking say this to another person for as long as you live.
I don’t know if you understand what that sounds like, and I really couldn’t give a fuck. Abuse does nothing but make you feel like a worthless piece of shit that would make everyone’s lives a lot better if you were dead. You spend every day trying to make yourself as small as possible, as docile as possible, to avoid getting hurt. And it never works, but you keep hoping someday you’ll find the right words, the right thing to do, that keeps them happy. It grinds you down and takes away whole parts of you, and you think you deserve it. That’s the worst part. Thinking that you don’t deserve parts of you, because you aren’t good enough. You’ll never be good enough. You are not enough.
I spent years trying to get away, and years and years afterwards trying to rebuild every part of me. I’m still rebuilding. So to say this, to say that someone you’re the lesser person because you haven’t been abused? As if my abuse is some burden on you?
Don’t ever say it again.

The first thing I’d say is you have to determine whether we’re actually even TALKING about you when we’re raging. We’ve stated pretty explicitly in other places that we don’t expect anyone to see everything (especially on a first read-through) so I’m just going to quote relevant bits at you rather than trying to restate it all.

There’s the stuff that is obvious and everyone should see it the first read through but then there are other things that you really only notice once you’ve started opening your eyes and specifically looking for it and re-evaluating everything you’ve seen and been told.

Characters within universe do not have the same advantage we do like multiple points of view, tags, etc. It is often more difficult to recognize such signs in real life (especially more subtle ones like emotional and psychological abuse) than it is in a story. In a story, words are chosen very carefully and everything presented is important in one way or another. In real life that can sometimes get buried in and amongst ALL THE OTHER DATA that we are taking in and is much easier to dismiss. We also realize that so many readers (especially on a site like tumblr) are very young and hopefully haven’t had experience with such situations. This is why we have been SO VOCAL calling out this stuff in the story because people need to PAY ATTENTION in order to catch this in real life, and we want to teach you about it before it happens so you can protect yourself and others.

The other important thing is you are not going to notice everything the first time through. Some of it is very subtle, and likely many people missed it up until chapter 4 when it is so in your face (Rumlow dragging Bucky around by his hair and throwing him in the shower to be hosed off like an animal) that it is impossible to miss. The important thing, though, is that once you see it you start re-evaluating all of these interactions rather than choosing to turn a blind eye. (For example, not accepting Rumlow’s reasoning of “he’s an addict” as an acceptable excuse for treating Bucky in such a way. That’s something you may not have realized is victim-blaming. Bucky’s drug use does not excuse this or make him any less worthy of compassion and human dignity than someone who does not use drugs.)

And that’s pretty much the difference. There are people who really just didn’t notice because they’ve been fortunate enough not to have encountered these things whether in real life or portrayed so faithfully in fiction. We’re doing our best to show these people what to look for so that they won’t be taken in by abusers in real life. It’s the people that do see it and choose not to look or to blame the victim or that show a distinct lack of compassion for a human being that are the ones that really piss us off.

So are you actively ignoring the abuse once you’ve seen it? Are you making excuses and trying to shift the blame from his abusers onto Bucky as though he’s the one responsible? No? Then we’re not yelling at you.

We KNOW that not everyone is attuned to that. This is why we’re trying to SHOW you what’s happening. But the thing is, not having dealt with abuse before DOES NOT ABSOLVE YOU from having to be a decent person. There are some things you see that you just can’t ignore and you can’t use your inexperience as an excuse. That’s where boop’s brilliant post about the importance of Sam’s arc comes in.

Not seeing abuse does not make Sam a bad person. It doesn’t negate his compassion or the care he might have for a victim whose situation you are unaware of. Sam isn’t a bad guy. He’s not a cruel or neglectful person. He legitimately can’t see the truth of what he’s looking at because the effort that has gone into hiding it is substantial.

But, and here is where Sam’s character comes into its own: he’s learning. He’s starting to see beyond his own expectations and the smoke screens and that is the single most important thing. He might not have spotted it on his own, he doesn’t have Clint’s background or experience with which to see things as clearly, but he is starting to put the pieces together and now one domino has fallen, he’s actively engaged in seeing the rest follow. And as for what he does when the truth does come out…

…well, there’s a reason I think Sam’s story arc in Snake Eyes is really second only to Bucky’s.

Sam is the stand-in for those who may not have noticed the subtler signs of abuse. And that doesn’t make him a bad person. What’s important is how he reacts when he does finally see it.

So like, if you’re still feeling attacked and like you’re a bad person I really don’t know what to tell you there except stop making the situation about you and instead listen to what people are saying. Because open discussions of abuse are more important than the slight discomfort people who have not been abused may feel at hearing us talk about it.

(As for the “not having been abused does not make us lesser people. Does it?” part, I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you didn’t mean that the way it came out, though I can’t imagine how you might have meant it.

Being treated as “lesser people” is something that victims of abuse have to deal with all the time, whether it’s being thought of as “damaged goods” or being blamed because people would rather believe that in a “just universe” victims of abuse did something to deserve it rather than accepting that bad things just happen without any good reason. So when you phrase it like that it’s co-opting a struggle they have to face every day, and it’s gross. Don’t do it.)

Have I told you that ink-phoenix, thunderboltsortofapennyinvisiblespork and of course boopboopbi are some of my favorite people and honestly I could just listen to them talk about Snake Eyes all day and be all parts happy and sad at the same time. 

Like, poor friends have had to endure me ranting about Snake Eyes for weeks and I really do apologize you guys. 

snake eyes

filthyyuckysteveandbucky:

i want canon bi steve although privately… im fond of gay steve…. who still loved and thinks the world of Peggy and would probably have married her and everything

WHICH REMINDS ME i get wanting stories where people arent all repressed or tortured or whatever by their sexuality AND im not saying that has to be there BUT sometimes? ? people act like steve and bucky living in a gay neighborhood means they would have exactly 0 issues with their own sexualities and like lol

that’s not how that works?? like it can be! ! But sometimes people act like it’s wrong for them to still have any kind of internal conflict about it and i assure you, your immediate environment being welcoming to that doesn’t make you impervious to the bigotry and norms of mainstream society

and like did u know you can even be totally accepting and a fierce ally and still be in denial or closeted?? whoA there!

so u know. just… mentioning…

I went to pretty accepting school in high school and I was the most CLOSETED person there. Like, I 100% was under the belief I would never even think about another girl other than friends. And I was actually kind of a dick about it - I mean, outwardly I was accepting and nice but inwardly I could be a brat and super judgey toward my bi/gay/lesbian/etc friends. 

And then when I was in college and was like: Hot damn I actually really do love everyone I felt like a DILDO. Like straight up I can’t believe I treated people like that. 

I instantly apologized to my close friends for the shit I had done and was like: I honestly didn’t realize. Here I was surrounded by people of so many different genders and sexualities and I didn’t see it in myself.